Every night, she swims through murky waters,
A helpless, smiling, witness under the starry sky,
The monotone shades of a world long gone,
The loss of colour like the absence in her mind.
She walks through her life on her tippy-toes,
Waltzing through the worst of it all,
She smiles through her tears every night,
And wonders when she’ll wish everything goodbye.
She feels trapped in a gilded cage,
Trapped, as she looks down, but smiles,
Miniature memories and happy times spearing through her heart,
She thinks, perhaps, I’ve finally finished playing my part.
The world gradually grows sadder and sadder,
The white and black clashing in the recesses of her mind,
Yet she walks on, smiling, thinking of the life she will take,
Fragile, delicate, and so, so afraid to break.
When did she become like this?
Was it after the insults and the hits?
After the heartbreak and shattered lies?
Or was that final moment her breaking point?
Arguments, screaming, fighting, crying,
Anger, fury, “I AM TRYING”,
Alone, isolated, deserted,
Little pieces every day, stripped away, dying,
Struggling, to hold on, hold on.
A gradual build-up of burden,
A devastating decision made,
A war in her mind, being waged,
But it is far, far too late.
Slipping, sliding, still smiling,
Grasping onto those last shreds of life,
Whispers of a time now lost,
Like the fluttering remnants of that winter frost,
Finally, finally, she’s gone.
Signing off…