Even though “Diary Of A Wimpy Kid” and “Dork Diaries” taught me to write ‘Dear diary…’ and write a whole lot of nothing after(though I’d pretend I was introducing myself to a real person), I didn’t realise journaling was so much more effective for real life problems(though you could still start with the ‘dear diary’ prerequisite).
But journalling can get boring. I mean, who wants to spend time writing when we can simply internalize and explode days later…
However, for people who want to, know that it’s become a handy tool for relieving myself of stressful assessments, failing friendships and life in general, when everything becomes a bit too much. So, here’s a little idea of how to do it in a way that helps you (which has worked for me anyway).
- Listen to music while journaling
Sometimes, writing out an emotional state can be difficult. Music can help calm your mind enough to be able to deal with it without lashing out or ripping up a journal- been there, done that.
- Stop overthinking the format and the actual writing part
It’s a space for MESSINESS AND CRASHING OUT. Not an English exemplar. But, if orderliness and neatness and aesthetics is something you prefer, invest in a bullet journal! Use washi tape or doodle on pages to make it your own.
- Don’t handle it as a chore
If you don’t feel like writing, don’t. BUT, if you make a habit of it, it can work better for you as you learn to release emotion in a healthy way. Journaling isn’t for everyone and doesn’t work for everyone- in that case, try voicing it in random voice recordings. That’s fine. Building a habit which you enjoy is the important bit, though. Find a time, a place where you’re comfortable- something that makes it feel grounding, and not like Math homework.
- Don’t follow “parameters” for self-reflection
Yes, prompts like “what’s something I’m grateful for?” can help, especially when you’re feeling stuck- guided journals, e-journals with templates are all great resources if you prefer this method. Sometimes though, boxing yourself into those parameters can make writing more challenging and cause MORE frustration which often turns into a negative spiral. Start by venting, then you’ll realise that as you go, you’ll automatically write the emotion you’re feeling in the moment. It’s a method called free writing, and this works even when I have writer’s block. Instead of placing a boundary in your head or a set question by which you MUST abide, keep writing as you go- what you feel, what happened, what you see, hear, hate, love IN THE MOMENT. Yes, you might look back a year later and think it’s stupid, embarrassing- but at least you’ll get to laugh about it and realise that all problems aren’t as big as we make them out to be.
- Write letters to your past or future self.
This sounds silly, but it’s a good feeling when you look back on these self-letters and realise how much you’ve evolved (like me looking at my writing across the years). Not only does it help you feel hopeful but shifts your focus onto joy you want to bring into your life in the future. In the long term, when something seems to be spiralling out of control, you’ll pick up one of those letters and realise you did so much more or achieved whatever you thought you could.
I think the most important thing is, journalling isn’t a fairy godmother’s magic wand. But it’s a safe space, no one judges, you’re simply plucking big thoughts out of your head and putting them onto paper to make it even a bit less scary. It’s like untangling a couple thousand knots- slow, sometimes frustrating and messy- but freeing.
Signing off…