An Em Special

When I first introduced myself to all of you, starting this website for the very first time, I’m sure the readers who stuck around from the very beginning would’ve remembered my avid description of Em, my younger sister, as the bane of my life, yet the person I relied on to make my days a slight bit lighter than usual.

May 16, 2021, she was introduced to the world as Em, the Empress of Mischief. Introducing… The Empress of Mischief! | Mili’s Mindscape

Sarcastic, dramatic and with enough sass to go around even as a newly turned 4-year-old, that attitude has only been further exacerbated by her rapid transition into pre-pre-teen mania, geared up to hit the dreaded 10 in two years. And today, I find this very creature writing as a very special guest writer on my blog.

Time really does fly. Four years, hitting a fifth next year. Looking at my writing back then, I do want to bleach my eyes and question everything I did as an eleven-year-old, but at least that’s a dominant marker of growth and progress.

So, once more, after a four-year hiatus, I hereby introduce (with the loud sound of a bugle), the Empress of Mischief, yes that’s right, my darling disastrous sister, whom I lovingly call ‘Em’.

Ah, memories, memories

Enjoy!

Me and My Sister

It’s all the same when you have an older sister. Sure, they rule over you sometimes, they are bossy, and they can get mad when you are irritating, even though you are not! But my sister is completely different. COMPLETELY! She calls me a toad face and she becomes as angry as a bull whenever I try to embarrass her.

“Get up, toad face!” yelled a cranky voice.

Ugh! Why did my annoying sister always have to interrupt my sweet dreams! Couldn’t she just keep her mouth shut and let me sleep? I woke up and forced my eyelids to open. Since mum and dad were in Paris, my sister obviously thought that she could rule over me. Yes! I knew the answer was YES! I slowly leapt out of bed…

“Toad face! Stop showing me that toad face! I said GET UP FASTER!”

“Fine!” I groaned. Honestly, why did she have to be like this? I went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth and ran down the stairs excited about what breakfast was. Instead, I saw my sister eating a bowl of cereal! “Toad face, there is no more cereal left, so you can cook your own food! Today is your lucky day!”

“First of all, stop calling me a toad face and secondly aren’t you supposed to cook my food?” I said very confidently.

“First of all, stop calling me toad face and secondly aren’t you supposed to cook my food?” she mocked me.

“No! I am not cooking your food for you! Big girls cook their own food. Babies need help to cook! Are you a baby or a big girl?” she cackled.

I stormed off full of anger and frustration. Then I decided, I would carry out my revenge! Yes, me, Em, would take my rightful revenge.

I pulled out a big bowl and dumped in strawberries, pouring in a ton of custard. Then, I took out the electric mixer and started it. I increased it to the highest speed, and it went SPLAT.

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” My sister screamed

It was on her hair! I smothered a giggle. My sister was very protective of her hair. She shampooed almost every day and never let anyone touch her hair.

“Why are you laughing?” my sister asked with annoyance. “Get me a TISSUE!”

I was very pleased with myself. Then you know what I screamed at my sister? “NO, I WILL NOT GET YOU A TISSUE! Food fight!”. I took the big bowl of custard and threw it on my sister’s hair! My sister picked up her cereal bowl, came to the kitchen, pretended to put the whole cereal in the sink and finally, for the final part of her plan, I expected her to dump it all on my head. I WAS RIGHT!

She dumped it all over me, and I was soaked. My hair was sopping wet, and my clothes stank. I yanked up the carton of custard and dumped it all over my sister.

The whole house was a mess. Everything was wrong. I wished Mum and Dad were here. My sister grunted a very angry grunt indeed.

Maybe I should’ve been nicer, I thought regretfully.

“Sis, do you want me to clean up and you can go take a shower?” Suddenly, my sister smiled, warm and kind. She went upstairs, and I cleaned up the mess.

When my sister came down, she saw the house. She thanked me for offering my help. I hugged her and apologized for the mess I made.

I learned that it’s always kindness that comes first! Not being rude!

The End

BEFORE ALL OF YOU COME FOR ME, ALL THE ALLEGATIONS IN THIS PIECE ARE FALSE. I’VE BEEN FRAMED AND I’M FILING A DEFAMATION LAWSUIT.

No Ems should be harmed in the near future.

Not being rude, she said.

Signing off…

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